Motivate This! – Entry #007

Like Arson
Coming soon to a local gym facebook post near you!

While this isn’t necessarily an untrue statement, it’s definitely not the kind of affirmation/motivation you hand out to just anybody.


“What’s that you say bouncer man? Hands off the dancers? Pfft. The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do!” Ten minutes and three cracked ribs later…

“Pull over and put my hands where you can see them? No way Po-Po! Driving 70 kph over the speed limit is awesome because the greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do!”
One high speed police chase and sixteen charges later…

“I know arson is frowned upon but I hate my neighbour so much and, as they say, the greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do!”
Seven fire engines and fifteen to twenty years later…

“Society tells me it’s wrong to bathe in the blood of virginal panda cubs then curb stomp puppies while dancing naked through a kindergarten, but one of my highly suggestible friends on facebook reposted a picture that said the greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do!”

And so on, and so on…

Obviously this affirmation should be given out only after a rigorous psychological evaluation. I mean, we have an entire judicial system in place specifically because people do what people say they cannot do.

And honestly, if your happiness is derived solely from doing what other people have told you you can’t do, you may have a problem.

Motivate This! – Entry #001

Being citizens of the modern age I’m sure we’ve all happened across those “positive affirmation/motivational” pictures while online.

You know the ones.

Allegedly profound words that are typically set against a beach at sunset or, alternatively, emboldened words on a flat background. Designed to affirm and/or motivate.

We all have at least one friend on facebook that is compelled by an unknown force, possibly Morgan Freeman, to spew out these supposed wise-bombs ad nauseum.

So, in the spirit of pointing out how utterly ridiculous and completely nonsensical these words/pictures can be, I present this inaugural post.

Continue reading “Motivate This! – Entry #001”