Rockmelons II – The Revenge.

Apparently I’ve severely underestimated the allure of rockmelons. Much like the Siren of Greek myth luring an enraptured sailor to his watery grave, the temptation of the rockmelon is seemingly impossible to resist.

According to ABC news:

A Victorian man in his 80s has become the fifth person to die in a listeria outbreak after eating contaminated rockmelons.

I TRIED TO WARN YOU ALL WEEKS AGO! THIS STORY IS IN THE NEWS EVERY DAY! FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY! THE ROCKMELONS ARE CONTAMINATED! STOP EATING THEM! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? I DON’T UNDERSTAND!!

Continue reading “Rockmelons II – The Revenge.”

Australia Finds A Brand New Way To Kill Its Citizens.

It’s common knowledge that Australia is full of things that can, and will, kill you.

Snakes, spiders, horses, crocodiles, sharks, dingoes, psychos, assholes, farms, amusement park rides… It’s little wonder we drink so much.

For those of us that somehow survive the daily onslaught of these perpetual threats, it’s time to add a new nefarious killer to the list.

Continue reading “Australia Finds A Brand New Way To Kill Its Citizens.”